||[Jun. 7th, 2006|03:36 pm]
Doggett is love
|||||"Another Girl's Paradise" by Tori Amos!||]|
I've been ordered to post this fic here by one of our friends here (samincittagazze) , so here it is. It's sad, I'll warn ya of that.
Title: He'll Come Around
Fandom: The X-Files
Characters: John Doggett & Monica Reyes
Prompt: #47 - "it's a cold day in a cruel world, I really wished I could have saved you; then who would save me from myself?"
Word Count: 577
Summary: It's too soon.
Author's Notes: Basically a huge spoiler for THE SCENE with Luke. If you know the series, you know what scene I'm talking about. Monica's POV from the scene.
The next breath I am about to take catches in my throat. It's him. Luke Doggett. John Doggett's son. Lying facedown in this field. This green field whose color seems all too alive given the circumstances.
I can't do it. I have to let John know, but I can't do it. I've done it before, told people about their children, but this is different. This is John. I've felt something with him since I was assigned to this case. It's like fate brought me to him for a reason.
Finding Luke dead was NOT that reason.
I finally turn to face John. My eyes must be giving everything away, because his stony expression crumbles as he walks toward me with long strides, keeping his gaze fixed on mine until Luke's body comes into view.
He stoops to his son's lifeless body, wanting to touch him, but knowing he can't because of the possible evidence that could still be on Luke.
The second I see a tear roll down John's cheek, I turn away. I can't do this. I have to get out of here before I start crying myself. It's one thing to cry when I'm alone, but crying in front of John would not be acceptable.
I have to let him know where I'll be, though. I gently touch his shoulder, and he looks up at me hopefully.
"I...I'm going back to the hotel," I say, voice cracking despite my insistence that it stay calm.
John nods soundlessly and turns to Luke again. I start walking away,m then feel John's presence behind me and stop.
"Agent - Monica. I just wanted to say..."
"No. Please don't say it," I interrupt him. I turn to face him again. "I'll be at the hotel." On impulse, I lean in and brush a chaste kiss across his cheek. It's highly inappropriate, but it felt like the right thing to do.
I'm about to leave again, then John's voice stops me. "I know you did what you could, Monica. I don't blame you."
"No. But you blame yourself. Which is worse, John?" I haven't faced him. "You still have a chance to save yourself." I don't move, because I know he has a response.
"I don't believe in all that crap, Monica," he says softly, so I know that even though his words say otherwise, he knows what I'm saying is true.
I assume he's done talking, so I start walking again when I feel a weight on my shoulder. I glance over and see John's hand, so I turn and face him yet again.
"What is it, John?" I ask after he says nothing.
He shakes his head. "I know where you'll be. Go. I need to talk to Barb."
I nod slowly. It seems like there's something else he wants to say, but I'm not going to push him. That's the last thing he needs right now. I put my hand on his for a moment, then finally walk away.
After I reach my car, I look back and see John standing in the middle of the field, motionless, looking as lost as Luke probably felt. He says he knows where I'll be, but I'm not expecting to see him. It's too soon. Right now, he's acting calm, rational, but tonight... I can already see it in his stance, the blank look in his eyes. He'll need saving, and I hope someone's there to catch him when he falls.